Salah's tales from Iyana-Ipaja Orientation Camp (Or was it Agege?) Part 1

First and foremost, this is a kinda rough draft but I feel like doing this for a start. Enjoy!

 Despite being born and raised in Lagos, I had never heard of any NYSC Orientation Camp in the state. Immediately I was posted to Lagos State for my service, I developed anxiety because of my kind of person. 

"How would I cope in such an environment?" To worsen matters, none of my friends was posted to Lagos.

I arrived at the Orientation Camp after a two-hour or so ride that cost me #2500. I had a travel companion in my cousin, who was also posted to Lagos for his NYSC. 

At the gate, I was accosted by vendors selling all sorts of ridiculous stuff to then-PCMs (us, the otondos). I remember a woman persuading me to buy a bucket and bowl for #1200 on the premise that the buckets inside would cost far more. Someone brought me a branded NYSC lapel for #500 and told me it was important to buy it. Luckily for me, I had run out of cash doing some late shopping the day before, so I couldn't buy anything from them. Weeks later, I got to learn that one of my roommates, Faruq, spent close to 5k outside the gate 😂😂😂😂😂.

As soon as I entered the place, the air around me changed and I knew I had come to a different reality. I went through all the stress of registration and all, then I realised that my box was not loaded into the bus kept at the gate to help us transport our luggage to the hostel. I needed a couple of stuff from the box and I returned to the gate, where I found it. That was where the camp drama started. 

Welcome to my camp story!

When I tried to carry my box into the hostel, a policeman we later came to know as 'Ijebu Connect' stopped me and asked to search the box. No wahala, I opened it. Ijebu Connect started throwing out my stuff on the floor. Ah! There and then, I knew I would have a problem with this Ijebu Connect guy. 

On sighting my provisions, IC exclaimed and made an ill-advised comment on the effects my consumption of sugar would have on my future. Funny enough, there was no single grain or cube of sugar in my luggage that day. Na from there IC buy market for my hand.  

After successfully scattering my stuff and turning it upside-down, IC cleared me and released my luggage. I managed to squeeze everything back into the box and left the place for my hostel. 

Before I settled, I put my name down as a Red Cross volunteer on the first day of camp. I also wrote my name as one of the footballers for my Platoon, but I didn't later go through with the football. Looking back, I'd say it was one of my smartest choices cos omo! Those guys played like it was the World Cup or something o. Especially those Platoon Four boys, they played with so much anger and rage. 

Room 14

On completing my registration, I was allocated a bed space in Room 14, and I narrowly missed out on being the Room Leader. I for flex muscle like mad!!  Immediately I entered the room, I scanned and chose a bed beside the window. I met a couple of guys in the room, and against my nature, I greeted them and even asked them to tell me their names, much to my own surprise. We were going to be stuck together for the best part of a month, so there was no harm in knowing each other. We got our kits and everybody started hustling. Those kits were out of this world.

First, my shorts felt like they were made from cardboard. They did not look or feel like they were made for human use at all. Then came the T-shirts. They were just as atrocious as the shorts were. The shoes were a couple sizes too small, and the socks were bad in their own way. I found the khaki manageable because I managed to leave camp without a major tear, that was a huge W for me. Honestly, the kits were bad. Very very bad.

Remember my cousin? He took the bed under mine and our room was soon filled. There were 24 of us in the room. On the first day, everyone kept to themselves except those who came with their friends, so there was not much to say. 

I quickly found the mosque, and it was surprisingly very well set-up with quality rugs, its own generator, running water, sockets and lots of fans. It was a brilliant place to be, tbh.

I saw a number of my classmates from school on my first day, but I had no relationship with them from school so we just said Hi and went on our separate ways. 

After a long day, everyone was eager to go to bed and sleep ahead of the proper start of camping. 

I know I may have already said this once, but camp started for me on the second day! I hope to be able to continue now that I've started, at least.

PCMs- Prospective Corps Members 

IC- Ijebu Connect 

Salah's College Chronicles Vol. 2

 Coming back to school for my second year in the College was very easy for me. I had my mind set to enjoy the year and block any unnecessary noise and bad vibes. As usual, those seniors came and said 300l was going to be hard, we'd need to work hard, blah blah blah. In my mind, I just said Eshey, E Ku ife (Thank you for your love), no one was going to stress me. I had a routine at the beginning of every semester where I missed the first week of lectures, so that I'd know which lecturers would be taking us, make I no go loose guard. Omo, unfortunately the day I resumed, the lecturer gave us a test in ANA 303. Me that I had not even collected last class information Ha! I sha did the test, I was sure I wasn't getting a zero sha. 

Because I wanted to just chop life throughout the session, my attendance was not great. I actually didn't skip classes, I only went whenever I wished to. Me and Mahmud especially, we became legendary late comers. One day, we were late as usual and the lecturer was on the podium, teaching the class. Mahmud and I entered together, and he went straight to a socket to charge his phone. Ah! This boy want to koba me sha🙆🙆🙆, Alhamdulillah the lecturer only called him a mad man, he didn't send us out. We went to lectures to just listen to our lecturers speak, me I knew somehow somehow, God no go shame us.

Few weeks after resumption, I was appointed as the secretary of the faculty's academic unit, FACBAMSS. I had to work in tandem with the coordinator to organise meetings and all that other stuff sha, so I was normally in school for most of the day. It wasn't too hard because my roommate was the most introverted person I had met, so he would be at home whenever I got home, and there would be food. The quality of the food however, is a topic for another day (my guy used salt and pepper to massacre food). I used to eat the food with love sha, I remember one time when I made a mistake when I cooked food for me and Mahmud o, and he left everything for me. I ate it for TWO days, but not without swearing for him. I was also part of the faculty's team at the University-wide quiz competition. We didn't make it out of the group stage, a befitting tribute to Manchester United.

FOOTBALL

It was no surprise that football was my most interesting part of the year, afterall, I was there to enjoy myself. I remained as coach of my class team, and I remember my most memorable fixtures being against our immediate seniors, the 400l anatomy team. Our rivalry was like that of Real Madrid and Barcelona under Mourinho and Guardiola, respectively. We played 4 times that year, and fought 4 times, because each of the matches ended in a massive brawl, and we won one match apiece, with the other two ending in draws. It was a derby like none other. We eventually won the departmental Cup but we had to fight for it sha after a heavy heartbreak in the faculty Cup.

We were playing really well, we had beaten 100l Anatomy by like 9 goals to 2 on Tuesday in the Departmental Cup, but because the exams were drawing near, we were asked to play 3 matches in like 4 days. I stubbornly continued playing the same set of players on Friday, Saturday and Monday. On Monday we had a semifinal in the Faculty Cup against the 400l physiology class, my players were absolutely knackered. I remember Mahmud being the most energetic player on my team, but on this day, even a 10 Meter sprint was too much for him. One error led to another, and our opponents scored. Without exaggerating, I would say we had at least 15 shots but failed to score a single goal and we lost 1-0 in a game we should have won easily. 

The time I can absolutely never forget is the final game of the Faculty Cup, where I was chosen to be the referee. I was in danger of getting beaten because the 400l physiology guys were so poor in that game and they felt my every decision was against them. I made sure not to follow the ball to their side of the pitch lest their coach or supporters would attempt to manhandle me (I no Sabi fight). In my mind sha, I wasn't afraid because my class guys were plenty there, so I knew even if I somehow chopped slap, they would retaliate on my behalf. After the first half, they refused to continue, and they came to be placing curses on me like I was the one that koba them LOL.

STUDYING/READING

Studying for me was based on vibes. I read only when I liked. For me and my guys, night class became a place to charge our devices and sleep. We would leave home after eating half of our dinner, we would stuff our bags with our phone chargers and Ankara wrappers, with large sweaters for any adverse weather and deadly mosquitoes that may disturb our sleep. My schedule was normally to read for like one hour, sleep till like 3, then head home with my guys. Once at home, we would eat the second half of our dinner and sleep. I remember one particular day when we didn't go to school. My guy Toyeeb had a laptop on which we played PES, the only problem was that our hostels were separated by a thick bush spanning around 50 meters. This day, Toyeeb came to my place to read at night, so me and Mahmud decided to go over to his place also to play PES. Mahmud went first, and then I left home around past 10 to go and meet him. As I navigated my way around the bush and got to the house, I heard a rustling around and I was suddenly face to face with a gun-carrying vigilante. When the man started interrogating me, I could perceive a distinct whiff of alcohol on his breath, and his words were quite dragged. He was literally drunk and I was there struggling to identify myself because Mahmud had locked the gate from inside. I was sha praying for nothing to happen because I didn't even take my phone along. Fortunately, the man asked me to go and call who I was looking for, and I was able to locate the window and notify Mahmud. 

At a point, the UITH security began to pursue us away from the hospital complex where there was usually light and sockets to charge, and long waiting wooden benches to sleep on. We usually looked carefully at the guard on duty because there was a specific woman that always made sure to send us away. One day, one of them stole Musdhaliph's book and hid it because he stayed in the complex. Omo we had to beg this man before he released the book, and we had to promise not to come back LOL. After that day, we made sure to wait until they slept before we moved in, and we never switched on the lights at the place.

EXAMS

In my first semester ANA 309 exam, the lecturer gave us 6 slides over the course of the semester. On the day of the exam, I was surprised to see that we had 3 hours. In my mind, I was thinking "3 hours for laboratory techniques? Lmao". Omo when I saw the questions, I became humble. The lecturer set 6 questions, and the instruction before all of them was "Explain". EXPLAIN!! Me that I was struggling to hustle how to answer 4 questions at most, this man asked questions from every single page of his materials, something I didn't even read completely o. Wahala for who no read, double wahala for who no Sabi cram, triple wahala for who get small handwriting. As I was managing my small handwriting to write all I could, I saw people collecting extra sheets. How?? I had not even filled up half of my booklet, and I no be dullard. I sha managed to finish, I wrote some things I didn't even remember after the exam. I eventually passed the course well. To God be the glory Alhamdulillah.

RESPONSIBILITIES

I was appointed as MSSN class Naqeeb in my second semester, to my surprise. It was a new world for me, because I had never been an available person per se, so I didn't expect such a post. I had honestly never had such a responsibility. My first task was to work with my contemporaries to co-ordinate a class Iftar during Ramadan. It was a success, although it wasn't without its hitches. Drinks didn't go round, and the food was not properly done, so there were lots of disgruntled young men and women at the end of the day. It wasn't all happy sailing, as I only broke my fast around 8 pm that day, Omo hunger wan kill me.

I was also actively involved in planning and organising my faculty's annual health week. It really tested my patience, as a lot of times, things did not go to plan, but I had to maintain a cool head to all the matters. We embarked on a successful medical outreach, which I chaired, and a host of other events. At the end of the session, I was named the community volunteer of the year.

The session ended with some major news. We had been assigned project supervisors, and as usual, the seniors did all they could to instill fear in us. We're still inside the case till now sha.

I thought my 400l was going to be a walk in the park, that I'll catch premium cruise. I've never been more wrong with any assumption. Fam, 400l is the ghetto!!

Chelsea's Kepa Conundrum

    In January of 2018, Real Madrid were prepared to pay the € 20 Million release clause for Athletic Bilbao goalkeeper, Kepa Arrizabalaga, but coach Zinedine Zidane opted to wait patiently until the summer when he could land his first choice, Thibaut Courtois from Chelsea. Following this saga, Athletic offered Kepa a new 7 and a half year deal. By this time, he had established himself as one of the best shot stoppers in Spain. Immediately after the 2018 FIFA World Cup, Thibaut Courtois informed Chelsea of his decision not to return to Chelsea. This left Chelsea in a position no club wanted to be in, and they had to go all out for a new shot-stopper. They tried to sign Athletico Madrid's Jan Oblak unsuccessfully, and A.S Roma's Alisson preferred to move to Merseyside giants, Liverpool. Chelsea eventually settled for the less-heralded Kepa on a 7 year deal for a handsome sum of 72 Million Pounds, making him the most expensive goalkeeper of all time.

   In his debut season, Kepa was instrumental as Chelsea won the Europa League, but the most memorable moment of his season by far was his on-field confrontation with manager, Maurizio Sarri during the extra time of the Carabao Cup final against Manchester City, a game in which he refused to be substituted after he seemingly picked up an injury. Afterwards, he was left on the bench for a number of matches as a punishment. He ended the season on a high, playing a starring role as Chelsea romped to the title and also secured a third placed finish in the league. He had a save percentage of 67.8% in the league, keeping 14 clean sheets as he finished the race for the league's golden glove in third place behind Liverpool's Alisson and Manchester City keeper, Ederson. Kepa really fit into Maurizio Sarri's style, as he wanted a keeper who was comfortable with the ball at his feet. When Frank Lampard arrived in the following season, Kepa's job requirements remained the same. The 2019/2020 season started with a drubbing at the hand of Manchester United, but the team bounced back well and put up a spirited performance against Liverpool in the UEFA Super Cup, with Kepa making a number of crucial saves to deny Mo Salah and Virgil Van Dijk, before eventually losing on penalties. However, Kepa's performances began to drop, and he started to let in questionable goals. Eventually, he was dropped for 39-year-old backup keeper, Willy Caballero, who played in a number of league matches, as well as in the UEFA Champions League against Bayern Munich at Stamford Bridge. Before the suspension of football due to COVID however, Kepa was recalled into the team, and provided two immaculate performances against Liverpool and Everton, keeping two clean sheets. However, when the league resumed, he delivered some shaky performances, with the climax coming at Liverpool where after shipping in 5 goals, the defenders went berserk on him for not coming to claim a simple cross floated across his six-yard area. After this game, he ended up getting dropped again, and did not play a single minute till the season ended. By the end of the season, he had kept only 8 clean sheets, and had a save percentage of 53.9%, one of the lowest in Europe's top 5 leagues. 

   During the transfer window that preceded the commencement of the 2020/2021 season, speculation was rife about Chelsea being in the market for a new goalkeeper. The most notable links were to Atletico Madrid's Jan Oblak and Andre Obama of Ajax, with some other names being speculated as well. In spite of the links, Frank Lampard publicly backed Kepa as his first choice goal tender, and said he was sure that Kepa would keep his place between the sticks. In the opening game of the season, Kepa allowed a long range Leandro Trossard shot to squirm underneath him to draw Brighton level in a game that Chelsea eventually won 3-1, and also, in the second game against Liverpool, he spent too much time in possession, and Sadio Mane picked his pocket to double Liverpool's lead in a 2-0 defeat. Shortly afterwards, Edouard Mendy was announced as Chelsea's latest signing in the goalkeeping department.

   Since Mendy's debut in a Chelsea shirt, Kepa has only taken to the field twice, one time against Southampton when Mendy was injured, and the other in a dead rubber Champions League tie against Krasnodar. He failed to keep a clean sheet in either of those games. On the other hand, Mendy has kept 4 clean sheets in 5 Champions League appearances, and another 5 in 9 league appearances. Mendy has a save percentage of 75% in the league, compared with Kepa's 57.1%.

   Kepa's situation at Chelsea remains delicately poised, as it looks like the coach and even the defenders have very little confidence in his ability. It remains to be seen however, what the club decides to do with him. Do they keep him as a back-up option or sell him at a loss, or send him out on loan, just as Liverpool did with Loris Karius. It is up to the club and the player to decide on the best line of action to take, as Edouard Mendy seems to have made the number 1 shirt his. A loan might be the best option for Kepa, where he can regain his confidence and play regularly ahead of next year's Euros, or he could leave on a permanent deal, although the club's higher-ups would not be pleased with this, as no club would be willing to meet their valuation of Kepa as a result of his performances, and the pandemic.

TRAILBLAZER SERIES: THE CONCEALED ONE

 Abdullah Ibn Umm Maktoom was born to Qays Ibn Za'id and Aatikah Bint Abdullah. He was born blind, which was the reason behind the people calling his mother Umm Maktoom (Mother of the Concealed One). He was a cousin of the first wife of the Prophet, Khadeejah Bint Khuwaylid, and was among the first converts to Islam. He thus had a front row seat as Islam grew in Makkah, witnessing all of the suffering and persecution along with Prophet Muhammad (SAW) and the other companions. This not only strengthened his faith but also increased his determination to hold on to the religion of Islam as much as he could, and this in turn increased his devotion to the Apostle of Allah. He was always eager to learn by heart as much as he could of the Qur'an such that at times, he unintentionally sought to have the Prophet's attention all to himself.

   Most of the time he spent in Makkah with the Prophet, Da'wah was the most important part of the Prophet's duty. On one occasion, Prophet Muhammad (SAW) was concentrating on achieving the conversion of the nobles among his tribesmen, the Quraish, and had Utbah Ibn Rabah and his brother, Shaybah, Abu Jahl Amr Ibn Hisham, Umayyah Ibn Khalaf, and Walid Inn Mughirah, father of Khalid Ibn Walid, and was doing his usual preaching to these men, inviting them to leave their pagan gods and worship Allah. As the Prophet was thus engaged, Abdullah Ibn Umm Maktoom sauntered to him, and asked him to teach him of what Allah had taught him. Prophet Muhammad frowned and turned away from Abdullah, to continue preaching to the prestigious Quraish nobles. As soon as he finished with his preaching, he received a revelation from Allah, the first 16 verses of Surah 'Abasa (Q80 Vs 1-16), in which Allah admonished the Prophet for prioritising the group of disbelievers over one of his own brothers who had come in search of knowledge. 

   Abdullah was the first of the companions, alongside Mus'ab Ibn Umayr, to migrate to Madinah, where they were to teach the religion and Qur'an to the people of Madinah before the arrival of the Prophet from Makkah. When the Prophet (SAW) arrived in Madinah, he appointed Abdullah as one of the Muadhin, along with Bilal Ibn Rabah. Whenever Bilal made the adhan, Abdullah was charged with making the Iqamah. They switched their roles sometimes as well. When the Prophet (SAW) left Madinah, Abdullah was charged with leading the Muslims in prayers.

   Shortly after the battle of Badr, the first battle the Muslims engaged in, Allah revealed a verse in which the status of the Mujahideen, the ones who fought for Allah in battles, was proclaimed as a very lofty one. This revelation made Abdullah worried, as he knew be could not be allowed to fight on the battlefield due to his condition, and he spoke about it to Allah's apostle. Allah immediately revealed a clause in that verse, exempting those physically unfit from Jihad "Not equal are those who remain seated among the believers except those who possess disabilities and those who strive and fight in the way of God with their wealth and their persons..." Surah An-Nisa Q4 Vs 95. Abdullah wasn't satisfied with having to settle for an exemption, and he wanted to be a Mujahid. In the 14th year after Hijrah, he made a vow to be the standard bearer for the Muslims at the battle of Qadisiyyah, a major onslaught on the Persians. On the third day of the battle, the Muslims had overcome their adversaries. Abdullah lay among the martyrs, still holding onto the flag of the Muslims. His entire life was characterised by his dedication to the Prophet, and the Prophet's admiration of his person. He was left in charge of Madinah anytime the Prophet had to leave, showing the level of the trust Prophet Muhammad (SAW) had in him. He died as a martyr, and attained the pleasure of Allah with his actions.

International Football + COVID; Wisdom or Folly?

 Prior to the International break in October 2020, the last such break was in November 2019. The long break in action was as a result of COVID-19 which ravaged and is still ravaging the world, with parts of Europe and the United States of America facing an unprecedented surge in the numbers of cases on a daily basis. Club football was halted in most parts of the world in March 2020, and was not restarted until August, about 5 months later, with fans not allowed in stadia in most of the countries till date. For club football to restart, a number of measures had to be put in place. In the initial days of the restart, celebration of goals, for example, was banned in the German Bundesliga. Also, substitute players had to maintain a six-foot distance between one another while they sat on the bench, among many other rules. Eventually, some of the rules were relaxed and a bit of normalcy was restored. 

COVID-19 is a disease transmissible by mere touch or proximity, so measures had to be put in place in order to keep the players safe. Part of the measures taken by football clubs was the establishment of COVID "bubbles"- a group of people primarily resembling a household, allowed to stay together and move together without the necessary social distancing between them. A bubble is formed by a team's senior players and so, their interactions with people outside of the bubble is greatly reduced and care is specially taken when in the midst of others from outside their bubble. Through this bubble system, clubs have been able to effectively curtail the spread of the virus without really losing key players to diagnoses of COVID, and even in the face of a second wave of the virus, football looks set to be allowed to go on.

However, permitting International football to go on seems to have done more harm than good, as players from different clubs and COVID bubbles now have the freedom of intermingling with others, leading to an increase in the rate of infections. As a result, more players have gotten exposed to the virus, just like Liverpool and Egypt winger, Mohamed Salah, also tested positive for the virus after getting into the Egyptian national team camp for an international friendly match. On the 12th November 2020, Croatia faced Turkey in an international friendly match where their captain for the game, Domagoj Vida played the first half before receiving a positive result on his COVID test from the previous day. He had to be substituted, but he had already been exposed to the whole of the Croatian and Turkish teams. The next day on the 13th, England and the Republic of Ireland faced off in a friendly match. Alan Browne played the full 90 minutes before returning a positive COVID test the next morning. Both national teams had possibly been exposed to the virus through the friendly match. Also, Palmeiras youngster, Gabriel Menino had been training with the Seleçao, the Brazilian national team for days before he was confirmed to be positive for COVID-19. 

During the last International break in October, Cristiano Ronaldo tested positive for the virus and missed a number of important matches for his club side while he self-isolated at home. Also, Czech Republic had to invite a whole new squad of 23 players and coaching staff for their Nations League fixture against Scotland in October after their entire national team was exposed to the virus during their camping. These are just a few of the numerous cases that have arisen since International football was restarted. There have been clamours from different corners of the world over the safety of having these International matches at a time like this when the virus is on a rampage.

In addition to the spread of the virus, there's also the case of fatigue and susceptibility to injuries from the players. First, these players are not machines. Following the restart of football in August, some teams had to play up to 3 games every week so as to finish the season as quickly as possible, and within a month of the completion of the 2019/2020 season, the 2020/2021 season commenced. With this, there was very little room for the players to rest and recover the energy they had spent in the last few weeks of the season. Now, some teams play 3-4 matches a week, a good example being Tottenham Hotspur, who played 4 competitive fixtures in 3 competitions over a span of 8 days. Due to the fixture pile up, a lot of players have gotten injured this season compared to other seasons. Already, about 100 players in the English Premier League have gotten injured, with league champions, Liverpool being one of the hardest hit. This surge in the number of injuries is in some cases, as a result of muscle fatigue in these players who had a very short off-season and have a short period of recovery between matches.

Apart from suffering injuries, there's the question of whether the players are being exploited to make as much money off of them as possible, by the bodies in charge of the game. World Cup and multiple Champions League winner, German midfielder Toni Kroos bitterly complained of the futility of the UEFA Nations League matches which players are compelled to participate in, despite the competition having almost no face value whatsoever, having been formed to expel friendly games. For unimportant games as these, players are made to chalk up travel time, with some of them being in the air for the better part of a day. Chelsea's Brazilian Central defender, Thiago Silva had to miss his team's game against Southampton after having only gotten off a 10-12 hour flight from his native Brazil two days earlier. A lot of these players have to travel long distances to play in international matches despite having to play an average of 3 games weekly for their club sides. 

Surprisingly, even in the midst of all this, some international federations have deemed it fit to have their players play up to 3 matches within this 14-day long break. This is absurd, because even during the period pre-COVID, most teams only had to play 2 matches in the same span of days. With the increased number of games on the players, this just seems like an unnecessary measure at this time. 

The way the governing bodies have handled these issues begs the question of whether the players' welfare is important to them, or it's just the revenue they generate that really matters. Personally, I feel that the international break should be abolished until normalcy is restored to reduce the burden on players, as football could suffer damaging losses from the consequences of these breaks.

Salah's College Chronicles Vol. 1

 We go de alright my G, no worry we go run am. Naso we de talk am anytime kasala burst.

October 2017 was when I returned to Ilorin for the commencement of a new phase in my life. I had completed my first year in the University of Ilorin just a few months earlier. The session had been unbelievably tasking and strenuous. It was time to move to the College of Health Sciences.

SETTLING IN

It is worth mentioning that I had made acquaintances with more than a few of my classmates in my first year, but at the time of resumption to the College of Health Sciences, only two of them really stood out as my friends, Mahmud, who I had met in very bizarre circumstances in our first year and was in my department, Anatomy, and Musdhaliph, with whom I had been friends since secondary school and was in the sister department, Physiology. When school fully resumed in November, the first issue was accommodation. Mahmud had secured a place off-campus, whereas myself and Musdhaliph looked to secure a room in the school's male hostel. We spent the first few weeks shuttling between our lectures and a faculty official's office. After many fruitless visits and long queues, when it finally got to our turn to be attended to, Nigeria struck. The Non-Academic Staff of Universities NASU declared a nationwide strike, and just like that, our hopes of securing a place in the hostel died. Luckily, Mahmud had reserved a place for us, and had even been pressuring us for weeks to abandon our search for a place on campus and settle for one off-campus with him. 

I continued attending lectures from town even after I secured accommodation and moved my stuff, and only moved into my place on January 1st 2018. The first week after I moved in was crazy, partly due to the fact that my roommate refused to resume, and the fact that I was living on a diet of bread and soda because I was not interested in cooking, and I had no intention of eating out. I only ate cooked food like twice throughout the period. It really was a horrible period. I ate junk in the mornings and afternoons, and on my way home from school, bread and a fizzy drink would be my last "meal" of the day, even on days I fasted. When my roommate finally resumed a week later, I felt as if I had been awarded a gold medal in the Olympics. We quickly settled in, and things went smoothly.

LECTURES/PRACTICALS AND EXTRACURRICULAR ACTIVITIES

From my experience in 100l, lectures were a thing to dread. There were too few seats and too many students, it was a recipe for disaster. The environment was never conducive for learning. It was therefore a huge upgrade when I got to the College of Health Sciences and realised I didn't have to sit on the floor to receive lectures.

My basic tactic to avoid trouble was to simply evade notice. I made sure to sit down in the most populated areas of the class, where I would not be required to ask or answer questions in class. I just wanted to attend the classes and go home afterwards. Throughout my first year in the college, only one lecturer knew me from class, and that was because I enjoyed sitting in front and communicating with him as he took us through embryology.

In spite of my unwillingness to get noticed by lecturers, I wanted to do something different from just class work so I volunteered to be the class football coach because I loved football and despite having played a lot of it at a high level for much of my life, I knew I didn't have the strength and stamina to make the team as a player anymore. Unfortunately, my time as coach has been marred by so many near-misses, and my team has only ever won one trophy due to a combination of ojoro from our seniors, and bad luck on our side. I also joined the faculty's academic group, one which represented the faculty at university-level quiz and debate tournaments. I was among the representatives of the faculty at the Interfaculty Spelling Championship which we won in what was one of the highest points of my first year in the college.

Prior to our first practical session in anatomy, we heard things like "if you see cadaver you'll faint" or "cadaver de make girls vomit de cry sef". I don't know if it's coconut head my female classmates have or it was just an exaggeration from those who said it, because nothing slightly resembling their predictions took place. In our first dissection, I was one of the first (I think I was the first, actually) to touch and dissect a body. I did not have night terrors nor throw up afterwards. 

I spent most of my time in 3 places; school, mosque, and the nearby football viewing centre, where I always enjoyed watching football with my guy Toyeeb. We both supported Chelsea but the guy enjoyed arguments too much. He almost got beaten at the viewing centre one day.

STUDYING

From a young age, I hated studying school books, but here, I realised that I had to put in at least a basic effort to read, so that I wouldn't have myself to blame. When the session started, myself and my roommate, Musdhaliph decided to stay indoors and read our books as we saw fit. Few weeks later, we chose to start going to school every night after dinner to read in class. To do this, we would have to trek a distance far more than a Kilometre. When we started our "night class" style, Mahmud joined us some times, and other times, it was just me and Musdhaliph. We'd get to school by 9pm, joke and gist till 10pm, read till 12 or 1am, then head home after sleeping till around 3am. This was our usual schedule and it was followed quite religiously LOL.

At a period, robbers began targeting people on the road around the time we went home, and if any of us raised the topic of robbers attacking us, we'd quickly shoot it down, saying the robbers could not attack three men on the road. Mahmud always said we were only two and he made me understand a while later. That day, all three of us were heading home from school around past 3am when I suddenly saw Mahmud sprint away, and Musdhaliph followed suit quickly. I did not see or hear anything but to avoid stories that touch, I ran as fast as my legs could carry me. On getting home, none of them could say that they had actually seen something that caused them to run. Apparently, Mahmud thought he saw something, but there was nothing outside at that time. 

Another time, it was just me and Musdhaliph heading home at past 3 when we saw a group of women all clad in white approaching from a distance. We quickly ran back into school and stayed hidden until they passed. God no go shame us.

By the end of our first semester, Mahmud and Musdhaliph stopped studying in the same location as me because I was apparently too unserious, and it was rubbing off on them. Welp.

ASSESSMENT/EXAMS

We had our first assessment in December, a genetics test. It went really well for me and it gave me a good foundation to build from. My first heartbreak was also in the first semester, when we were supposed to have a BCM 221 test, but I was supposed to go to Lagos for my ophthalmologist appointment. I explained to the lecturer and he said there was nothing he could do and there would be no make up. I went to Lagos as planned, and on the day before the test, I set out for Ilorin in a perilous journey. Due to a combination of mechanical issues and traffic, I only arrived in Ilorin on the morning of the day of the test. The test eventually did not hold. I had gone through all that stress for nothing, but as always, we moved.

For me, my first semester exams went really quietly until the very end. We had gone for our GNS exam and were left with just one paper, BCM 221. Me and my guys decided to pool money together and cook soup. We had yam flour and semovita already, so we contributed money to get pepper, meat, vegetables and other stuff from the market. I cooked the food on the evening before the exam, and myself, Musdhaliph, Mahmud and Ridwan, Mahmud's roommate ate Semovita and Egusi soup. When the last 2 members of our group, Toyeeb and Slimmy arrived, they made Amala and ate. Mahmud ate from their amala as well. We had an exam by 8:30 the next morning so we decided to go to school and prepare for the exam. Mahmud couldn't make it as he had slept off after loading himself, and he only woke up few hours to the exam. I remember seeing him after the exam and he said "Guy na God no go make me fail this exam, I no Sabi anything". He ended up passing the course, regardless.

During my second semester exams, I had a close shave with wahala. It was ANA 206, a course that had claimed so many scalps in the previous session. I had gone to school with Mahmud and Musdhaliph to prepare for the exam, as usual. We remained in school till after we observed our Fajr Solat and day broke. As we headed home, it started raining and the rain beat us till we got home. On getting home, myself and my roommate decided to sleep for a bit, thinking(or rather hoping) that the rain would not subside soon and the exam would get postponed because we were so tired. The exam was scheduled for 8:30. A few minutes later(according to my mental clock), I heard someone scream from my window and looked out, it was Mahmud who had just finished having his bath and was dressing up who had come to check if we were almost ready so we could leave together for the exam. He was surprised to find us both fully in bed, tucked in. Apparently, the rain was only a slight drizzle, and had stopped almost as soon as it started. I checked the time and it was past 8, I quickly woke Musdhaliph up and we rushed through our preparations and only made it to school in time for the exam by sheer luck, owing to the fact that the students who were to take the exams were too much and a lot of rearranging was going on.

END OF SESSION

By July, I completed my second semester exams and had become very acquainted with life in the college. By the time me and my friends separated, I knew that life was about to get a lot more interesting in the next session, and I was not wrong.

AFCON 2022; THE SUPER EAGLES TAKE FLIGHT AGAIN

    Following a marginally successful third-placed finish at the 2019 African Cup of Nations in Egypt, the Super Eagles of Nigeria resume their quest to qualify for the 2022 edition of the biennial showpiece in Group L with a double header against the Lone Stars of Sierra Leone. Before the global hiatus caused by the COVID-19 pandemic, the Super Eagles last faced the Crocodiles of Lesotho in Matchday 2 of the qualifiers at the Setsoto Stadium in Maseru on November 17 2019 and triumphed 4-2 with Napoli star, Victor Osimhen starring with 2 goals and 2 assists. The Super Eagles had previously overcome next-door neighbours, the Squirrels of Benin Republic by a score line of 2-1 in the group’s opener on November 13 2019 at the Godswill Akpabio Stadium in Uyo.

    On paper, the illustrious names on the squad list of the Super Eagles should break no sweat in dispatching their less-heralded neighbours, but experience has shown us time and again that there are no pushovers in football. Twenty-four players were invited to do justice to the fixtures, with another 7 players placed on the standby list. The first match is billed to take place at the Samuel Ogbemudia Stadium in Benin City on November 13, and the second is scheduled for November 17 at the Siaka Stevens Stadium in Freetown. 

    The list released by the Coach, Gernot Rohr, sees the return of several players who missed the friendlies in October such as goalkeeper Daniel Akpeyi, midfielders Joe Aribo and Oghenekaro Etebo, and strikers Victor Osimhen and Emmanuel Bonaventure. There’s also a first call-up for 26-year-old Swiss-born shot-stopper, Sebastian Osigwe who plays his club football at Lugano FC in the Swiss First Division. FC Porto left-back, Zaidu Sanusi and FC Midtjylland midfielder, Frank Onyeka, both freshly-armed with UEFA Champions League experience have retained their spots, as have TSG Hoffenheim defender, Kevin Akpoguma, and CSKA Moscow winger, Chidera Ejuke. There is also a return of APOEL FC goaltender, Francis Uzoho to the squad, albeit in a standby capacity following his recovery from a knee injury that kept him sidelined for 10 months. Bordeaux winger, Samuel Kalu was surprisingly excluded from the roster, as was KRC Genk striker, Cyriel Dessers. Leicester City ace, Wilfred Ndidi remains absent as he continues to recover from an abductor injury. 

The squad list in full;

Goalkeepers: Maduka Okoye (Sparta Rotterdam, Netherlands); Daniel Akpeyi (Kaizer Chiefs, South Africa); Sebastian Osigwe (Lugano FC, Switzerland).

Defenders: William Troost-Ekong (Watford FC, England); Kenneth Omeruo (CD Leganes, Spain); Leon Balogun (Rangers FC, Scotland); Semi Ajayi (West Brom, England); Chidozie Awaziem (Boavista, Portugal); Zaidu Sanusi (FC Porto, Portugal); Ola Aina (Fulham FC, England); Jamilu Collins (SC Paderborn 07, Germany); Kevin Akpoguma (TSG Hoffenheim, Germany); Tyronne Ebuehi (FC Twente, Netherlands)

Midfielders: Oghenekaro Etebo (Galatasaray, Turkey); Joe Aribo (Rangers FC, Scotland); Frank Onyeka (FC Midtjylland, Denmark).

Forwards: Ahmed Musa (Unattached); Alex Iwobi (Everton FC, England); Emmanuel Bonaventure (Club Brugge, Belgium); Victor Osimhen (SSC Napoli, Italy); Kelechi Iheanacho (Leicester City, England); Samuel Chukwueze (Villarreal CF, Spain); Chidera Ejuke (CSKA Moscow, Russia); Paul Onuachu (KRC Genk, Belgium). 

Standby: Kelechi Nwakali (SD Huesca, Spain); Francis Uzoho (APOEL FC, Cyprus); Samson Tijani (TSV Hartberg, Austria); Abdullahi Shehu (Omonia Nicosia, Cyprus); Ramon Azeez (Granada CF, Spain); Ikechukwu Ezenwa (Katsina United, Nigeria).

    It looks set to be a good and winnable pair of games for the Super Eagles, as the players invited are in good form for their various clubs this season, giving Coach Rohr a positive selection headache. The invited players are expected to report to the camp after their clubs’ fixtures on the 7th and 8th of November. Concerns have been raised from various quarters about the lack of numbers in the midfield, with only 3 primary midfielders getting called up. It is important to note however, that Coach Rohr has opted to play West Brom man, Semi Ajayi, in midfield on a number of occasions in the past. A number of fans on Twitter were of the opinion that the coach should have opted for a lighter defence in favour of bolstering the midfield ranks with the addition of former Arsenal starlet, Kelechi Nwakali, now finally finding his feet in the Spanish topflight with SD Huesca, and Granada CF enforcer, Ramon Azeez. It was postulated that the addition of both men would add some steel to the midfield while Ndidi remains away.

    Following the release of the roster, a number of uncertainties have popped up from among the squad. First, FC Nantes man, Moses Simon, who was originally listed in the 24-man squad pulled out from the squad due to injury. He has since been replaced by Paul Onuachu, who was initially on the standby list. In the past week, first-timer, Sebastian Osigwe tested positive for the Corona virus and it remains to be seen whether he recovers in time to join up with the squad. Experienced defender, Kenneth Omeruo also picked up a hamstring injury while he represented CD Leganes in a league match, and it remains to be seen who gets drafted from the standby list as his replacement.  

    The Super Eagles are expected to get the job done comfortably and pick up maximum points from the two games as they aim to achieve successive AFCON appearances for the first time since qualifying for the 2008 and 2010 editions consecutively. It has been a long wait, and Nigerians hope this time around, the jinx gets broken.

20:20:17; A Tennis love triangle

    When youngsters Roger Federer and Rafael Nadal met in 2005 on the red clay of the Roland Garros center court to battle it out for a spot in the French Open final, both men could not have known that they would dominate the world tennis scene for the next two decades. Nadal won that match en route to winning his first Grand Slam, and has since gone on to win 100 matches on that court, losing only twice there in his career. Of the two men to have ever beaten him in the French Open (the other is Robin Soderling), a certain Novak Djokovic stands out as a third force in world tennis. As at 2008, the man with the most Grand Slam titles was Pete Sampras, with 14. 12 years later, only three men have won more titles than Sampras and they are Federer, Nadal and Djokovic. Both Federer and Nadal have won 20, with Djokovic further behind on 17 titles. These three combined have won 57 of 71 Grand Slams available since 2002, a whopping 80.2%. Considering the fact that these men have missed a number of Grand Slam events due to injury only puts the statistic into a clearer view.

    These men have shown that they are on a level of their own and all the statistics are there to back them up. On every surface (Hard, Grass, Clay), they hold the records for most wins and titles won. Federer has the best Open era record on grass (Wimbledon), having won 101 of 114 matches since 2001, with a win rate of 88.6%. Djokovic has the best record on the hard courts (US Open and Australian Open), winning 150 of 170 matches (88.2%) since he made his Grand Slam debut in 2005. Nadal meanwhile has the best record on clay (French Open), having won 100 of his 102 matches there with a win rate of 98%. Nadal’s exploits in the French Open have earned him the title “King of Clay”. He has won a mind-blowing 13 of his 20 Grand Slam titles in Paris, winning the Coupe des Mousqetaires more times than any other man in history has.

    Of these three, Federer is the oldest, and he has played in the most matches with 421. He has won 362 of these, giving him a rate of 86% in Grand Slam matches. He won his first Grand Slam on the grass surface of Wimbledon and first became World No. 1 in February 2004. He has gone on to hold on to the No. 1 for the longest time in history, with 310 weeks as World No. 1. Nadal is next to him in age, and he has won 282 matches from 321 played in Grand Slams, at a rate of 87.9%. He won his first Grand Slam in 2005 at the French Open and only became World No. 1 for the first time in August 2008. Djokovic is the youngest of the trio, and he has won 296 matches out of 341 he has appeared in (86.8%). His first Grand Slam came in the 2008 Australian Open, and he had to wait until July 2011 before he was first ranked as No. 1 in the world. It is fascinating how these men have gone on to completely dominate the specific events in which they won their first Grand Slam titles. Federer has appeared in and won the most Wimbledon finals in the Open Era, Nadal is the only man in history to win a single Grand Slam more than 10 times, and Djokovic has gone on to win the most Australian Open titles in history. Djokovic is also the last man to hold all four Grand Slam titles at once since Rod Laver did it in 1969.

    They have completely dominated the Grand Slam scene, with all three of them completing Career Grand Slams, and Nadal having an Olympic gold medal in the singles, completing the Golden slam. They hold most of the Open era records, and below is a breakdown of their Grand Slam victories;

Australian Open

US Open

Wimbledon

French Open

Total

Novak Djokovic

8

3

5

1

17

Rafael Nadal

1

4

2

13

20

Roger Federer

6

5

8

1

20

    On a head-to-head level, these men have a fascinating record. Djokovic has faced Nadal 56 times, more than any two players have ever faced each other in the Open era, and leads 29-27; he has faced Federer 50 times, with 17 of them in Grand Slams, a record, and also leads 27-23. Federer and Nadal have faced off 40 times, with Nadal ahead by 24-16. They hold the record for the most Grand Slam final meetings, with 9 meetings. Off the court, they have attested to having a good relationship, as was visible when during the COVID-19 lockdown, a call between Federer and Nadal was made public. They have appeared in a number of charity matches too, and Federer has paid several visits to Rafael Nadal’s tennis academy.

   Despite Federer and Nadal having more Grand Slam titles, Djokovic has the upper hand in the tennis GOAT race as he has had the most unblighted career of the three. Federer at 39 has had it hard with injuries and might be inching closer to his retirement, and Nadal, despite being much younger at 34, has had a hard time with injuries in his career. Djokovic is still only 33, and has barely been touched by serious injuries in his career. Federer utterly dominated the period from 2000-2009 where he won 15 of his 20 Grand Slam titles, but the period from 2010-2019 was dominated by Djokovic and Nadal, who won 15 and 13 titles, respectively. Of the three, Djokovic has a better chance of going on and winning more Grand Slam titles than any other man, and recent evidence proves that he is not stopping anytime soon.

NIGERIANS AND THE CRAZE FOR FOREIGN BRANDS

    Gucci, Versace, Louis Vuitton, Adidas, Nike, Tommy Hilfiger. These are some exquisite foreign brands that enjoy a considerable amount of patronage from Nigerians. This ought to be a normal thing, but then, the rate at which our people source for these brands is so high that it is gradually becoming a menace. 

   The bottom line is that our craving for these brands not only affects indigenous manufacturing businesses, but also affects the nation's economy. Most of us have the staunch belief that any product made by Nigerians is very likely to be a fake and would not serve us well. In order to survive, our indigenous manufacturers have adopted the names of some of these foreign brands to sell their products, further intensifying the claims that they produce fakes. Our warped belief and sense of belonging doesn't help their case because most of us never patronise them. Sometimes when I see people going crazy over an accessory because of its brand name, I ask myself "where are we headed as a nation?". We tend to prioritize products of outsiders over our own products and so, it's very unlikely that we'll make much headway as a nation, to be brutally honest. This is because at the end of the day, it's all money going out. These companies mostly do not have production facilities in the country and as such, don't reduce unemployment or improve the economy. As a result, the economy suffers as huge sums of money are spent yearly in importing and buying these goods. 

   A very good example is that of the Team Nigeria kit for the World Cup in 2018 produced by sportswear giants, Nike. These were released officially to the public for purchase at a standard rate of 41,000 naira for the jersey and 70,000 naira for the complete tracksuit. These jerseys came out for sale in Nigerian markets at 1,000 naira or slightly higher. These replicas were manufactured in the country by our own people, but are branded as fakes because they were not gotten from Nike. An ex-senator, Ben Murray-Bruce had something to say about the deal with the sportswear giants which cost about $100 million. He said that kind of money ought to have been utilised within the nation's economy with the contract being awarded to indigenous sportswear makers in Aba, a major hub for indigenous products in the country. We all know that the nation stands to gain from its association with Nike, but on the flip side, it would have been absolutely fantastic if the contract had been awarded to an indigenous sportswear maker. Given that kind of money, I'm absolutely certain that we'd have gotten good value for money from within the country, and at the same time, we'll have created employment opportunities for a large number of unemployed people in the country, also creating a good brand for ourselves. Renowned Musician and son of the late Fela Anikulapo Kuti, Seun Kuti has also in the past criticized our over-indulgence of foreign brands. We all know that there are lots of our indigenous manufacturers who can't be trusted because they are so corrupt and inefficient, but at the same time, there are so many others who do their work so well that they can actually compete with the foreign brands if given a chance. Now, there are so many brands from which you can be sure you're getting a very good quality. We know we aren't up there yet, but with a good market, our people will surely deliver.

   We are Nigerians, let us buy Nigerian and move Nigeria forward. Let's do away with our over-dependence on foreign brands and start patronising our own. This change of mentality is required, so we can stop seeing ourselves as inferior to the foreigners who produce these brands, and then the future would certainly be better for our child

OCTOBER INTERNATIONALS; WHO REPRESENTED THE SUPER EAGLES

     For avid football fans, the month of October 2020 was a breath of fresh air as they were finally able to see their darling national teams line up again following a hiatus of almost a year due to the ongoing Coronavirus pandemic.

    With the Super Eagles of Nigeria, it was no different as players were called up for two friendlies against Algeria and Tunisia on the 9th and 13th of October, respectively. For the sake of the players called up being foreign based, the friendlies were held in Austria as a result of COVID-19 travel restrictions. A number of regulars were however missing due to various reasons. Midfield anchor, Wilfred Ndidi was injured while playing for Leicester City in the Premier League, Oghenekaro Etebo was injured playing for Galatasaray, Francis Uzoho is yet to recover from the Anterior Cruciate Ligament injury he suffered, Joe Aribo was injured while playing for his Scottish club, Rangers, and Victor Osimhen could not make the trip from Italy due to fears of a possible Coronavirus outbreak in Naples.

    A squad of 26 players convened in Austria for the friendlies. The squad list in full;

Goalkeepers: Maduka Okoye (Sparta Rotterdam, Netherlands); Dele Alampasu (Ventspils, Latvia); Matthew Yakubu (SKF Sered, Slovakia); Tobias Lawal (LASK Linz, Austria).

Defenders: William Troost-Ekong (Watford FC, England); Kenneth Omeruo (CD Leganes, Spain); Leon Balogun (Rangers FC, Scotland); Semi Ajayi (West Brom, England); Chidozie Awaziem (Boavista, Portugal); Zaidu Sanusi (FC Porto, Portugal); Ola Aina (Fulham FC, England); Jamilu Collins (SC Paderborn 07, Germany); Kevin Akpoguma (TSG Hoffenheim, Germany); Tyronne Ebuehi (SL Benfica, Portugal)

Midfielders: Mikel Agu (Vitoria de Gunimaraes, Portugal); Samson Tijani (TSV Hartberg, Austria); Frank Onyeka (FC Midtjylland, Denmark).

Forwards: Ahmed Musa (Al Nassr SC, Saudi Arabia); Moses Simon (FC Nantes, France); Alex Iwobi (Everton FC, England); Samuel Kalu (Girondins de Bordeaux, France); Cyriel Dessers (KRC Genk, Belgium); Kelechi Iheanacho (Leicester City, England); Samuel Chukwueze (Villarreal CF, Spain); Chidera Ejuke (CSKA Moscow, Russia); Paul Onuachu (FC Midtjylland, Denmark).

    A couple of new faces had joined up with the squad, and young and promising players came through. Goalkeepers Tobias Lawal, a 20-year-old keeper from LASK Linz who was on the bench when his club faced Manchester United in the Europa league last season and Matthew Yakubu, a 21-year-old were called up as the goalkeeper uncertainty which has been with us since Vincent Enyeama retired looked to be solved. 18-year-old midfielder, Samson Tijani, who captained the Nigeria U-17 team, the Golden Eaglets at the U-17 World Cup in 2019 was also called up. 25 year old Dutch-born striker, Cyriel Dessers, who was the highest scoring Nigerian in Europe last season was also called up, Zaidu Sanusi, a 23 year old left back was also called up to shore up the defence, as was 25-year-old Kevin Akpoguma, who captained the German U-20 national team as they beat a Nigerian team containing Kelechi Iheanacho and Wilfred Ndidi at the 2015 U-20 World Cup. Twenty-two-year-old saucy winger, Chidera Ejuke, who made waves at Heerenveen in the Netherlands also got called up. Also, midfielder Frank Onyeka, 22, who appeared prominently as FC Midtjylland made the group stages of the UEFA Champions League for the first time ever, was invited.

    In the games against Algeria and Tunisia, it was evident that this was a side missing many of its key players, as the team struggled to find any rhythm and play in sync for most of the games, due to the fact that they had only about 11 days to acclimatize, train, and play together. It was thus understandable when the team played out a 1-0 loss to Algeria, and a 1-1 draw against Tunisia four days later. Chances were at a premium in both games, and only one goal was scored. In spite of a barrage of changes by coach Rohr, goalkeeper Maduka Okoye started and completed both games and looks to have secured the number 1 shirt following a pair of solid performances, with the highlight being in the second game against Tunisia when he had to make a brilliant stop to tip the ball over the bar late in the game after a cross almost caught him off-guard and the ball looked destined for the back of the net. Kevin Akpoguma also gave a decent account of himself in both games, and Chidera Ejuke showcased some of his impressive dribbling and close control against Tunisia. Zaidu Sanusi started both games at left back, and Frank Onyeka was also handed his debut, as was Samson Tijani. Overall, it seemed a positive outing as the players got to know each other, and they played some aesthetically pleasing football at times.

    Looking at these friendlies, we learned that the Super Eagles have enough quality to last a long while. For every aging player, there are two or three hungry young players waiting in the sidelines. The sky really is the limit for this team.